4:30pm and I have managed to watch two movies uninterrupted on my day off. I think to myself how unusual? I go up to the boy's room to wake up Aron. As I approach the door I noticed the door knob is greasy and I have to grab a towel to open it. Bizarre? I open the door to find my angelic child reading to himself quietly. After a brief conversation about enjoying quiet time by our self we decided to wake up Aden who was sleeping in our bed. The door was closed but strangely that knob too was greasy. I open the door to find the stack of blankets untouched by a sleeping child; to my left an entire tube of petroleum jelly spread all over the chaise, to my right my make-up drawer open.
As I approach my bathroom the scent of Lysol and hair spray make it to my nose. I turn the corner to see my makeup drawer empty. Small fingerprints of lipstick and rouge speckle the counter top, and then I see him. Aden sitting in a pool of lipstick, moisturizer cream, foundation, lip gloss, face wash, hand soap and hairspray- naked. As I assess the damage trying not to laugh, I see that he had painted the floor and all the luggage using my makeup and tooth brush, but that was only the start. The further into the closet I see that he had unloaded an entire bottle of Lysol onto a pile of all my shoes.
As Aden and I scrubbed all the lipstick out of the carpet I asked him why he did this to mommy's shoes. He said and I quote, "They were dirty, and smelled so I washed them." Why did you take out all of mommy's makeup? "I painted".
So for the next fifteen years please address all birthday and Christmas cards to Aden c/o Time Out Room.
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